The SaniTERRYum XVI: The Psyche of a Winner

Courtesy Tom Mleko

The beautiful thing about sports, about living in a city drenched in sports teams, engulfed in sports history is the ongoing cycle of teams to root for and follow. The Sox’ unexpectedly hopeful season just ended, the Cubs lost 100+ games (for the first time in 50 years, believe it or not), the impending strike may shorten/eliminate the Blackhawks’ season, the Bulls’ hopes rest on an ACL of the best point guard in the NBA, but da Bears? Da Bears are 3-1 and atop the NFC North. The cycle continues, and this leg of the cycle looks like a winner.

Da Bears look like serious contenders. Outside of an embarrassing loss at Lambeau, da Bears have looked like the best team in the NFC not representing the Bay Area. The defense is up to its usual tricks: forcing turnovers, scoring points (read: plural), and wreaking havoc on opposing defensive coordinators thus far (read: thus far). After the thorough thrashing of Rob Ryan and the Cowboys, we and the rest of the nation were reminded just how good this defense still is. Brian Urlacher is still the anchor of the D, the same way Jay Cutler anchors the other side of the ball. Both guys want one thing: to be competitive and win football games.

It’s no wonder than that after the aforementioned ass-kicking Dallas and the rest of Cowboy nation received Monday night, we were wondering about the psychological makeup of both stars, albeit in very contrasting ways. Through all the revelations we received Monday night, all the answers, we were still left with a few questions. We want to know why Cutler had a tiff with Offensive Coordinator Mike Tice, and we want to know how mentally tough Urlacher will prove this year, battling his obviously hankering knee(s?) injury.

Cutler’s magnetism begs us to talk about him, to write about him and his will to win. In this city, a city built on big shoulders, historical defense, and legendary running backs, we don’t know of this passing game you speak of. This is still so new to us. Cutler brings something we’ve never seen before his arrival. Does he know that? I don’t know. What I do know is that with the addition of Brandon Marshall this year and Cutler evolving into the quarterback and man he is capable of, da Bears have become…gulp…a passing team? This is dangerous on many levels.

Mike Tice calls the plays. Jay Cutler executes said plays. Bottom line. Was there a blowup between the two on the sideline after a failed 3rd and 1? That depends on how you define blowup. Was Cutler pissed that they turned the ball over to the punting unit? Obviously. I would be more concerned if there were no blowup at all. We criticize Jay when he seems complacent, and we criticize Jay when he shows emotion. Come on. You can’t have it both ways. I love the competitive fire, the spirit of “We may be up big on the scoreboard right now, but I want to shove it down their throat, I want to put this game away, leaving no doubt who wins.” The coverage of Cutler walking away from Tice on the sideline is a non-issue. Cutler is the leader of this team, but he has to mature and converse with the coaching staff every now and then, doesn’t he? That’s part of leading by example, beyond throwing touchdowns to Marshall and Devin Hester en route to victory and spreading the ball around to increasing targets. If we are to become a passing team (read: if), Cutler needs to maximize his potential, which will include heavy doses of competitive flames. The offensive line is starting to gel, evident in preventing Dallas’ up-to-this-point-lauded defense from having any effect on the game. He’s got plenty of targets (Hey there, Kellen Davis! Didn’t see you come in), Forte will get healthy, and Tice will learn where to pick his battles. Yes, that is part of Tice’s job description I’m sure. Know your personnel. But no one wants to talk about Mike Tice. Mike Tice is not going to sell papers, make you tune into the post-game show. I know my personnel…

Da Bears’ defensive personnel, on the other hand, could not have excited football fans any more than they did Monday night with their play. They picked off overrated Dallas Quarterback Tony Romo 5 times, scoring touchdowns on two of them. Components of the defensive core for years, Lance Briggs and Charles Tillman picked 6 once apiece, up and comer and potential Pro Bowler Major Wright intercepted twice, and D.J. Moore took one away late in the 4th quarter. Everyone on the defensive side got involved. Everyone that is, except for Urlacher. His own brand of competitive fire is still ignited, but I’m not sure Urlacher the of yesteryear is still in the house. He didn’t look like the Urlacher I know and love Monday night, but I know he’ll still have his moments, his flashes of brilliance. The defense, even without him contributing on a regular basis, will continue to dominate, but we miss you, big fella. Get well soon?

In the meantime, the rest of your personnel on both sides of the ball will handle business. Just ask Dallas.

Next stop: Jacksonville.

The Bag Skate…..Seau, the Cubs on the Farm, Rocky Horror Live Cast

by: Tony Leva
email: tonytrucker1969@gmail.com

Junior Seau, CTE and where this all may lead

On Monday, future NFL Hall of Fame linebacker Junior Seau put a gun to his chest and pulled the trigger, ending his own life at age 43. This is eerily similar to how former Bears defensive back Dave Duerson took his own life in February of 2011. Duerson left a note saying he intentionally left his brain intact so it could be studied for chronic traumatic encephalopathy, commonly known as CTE. It’s a degenerative brain disease that has been linked to violent contact sports like football and hockey. Repeated blows to the head in these, and other, sports are suspected to directly lead to CTE, which in turn causes the victim to suffer from memory loss, depression, confusion and aggressive behavior. Obviously, suicidal tendencies are also a symptom and unfortunately, sometimes the last symptom.

With the recent deaths of hockey players considered “enforcers”, Rick Rypien, a CTE victim who committed suicide, the possible suicide of Wade Belak, a depression sufferer, and the overdose of Derek Boogaard, also a depression sufferer and CTE victim, the hockey community has been seriously questioning the role of enforcers in the game as its becoming apparent the constant punches to the head may be directly linked to CTE. Considering the relative youth of these 3 players…Rypien was 27, Boogaard was 28 and Belak was 35…the crippling effects of CTE manifesting itself in such young men is truly frightening. If getting into fights on the ice is linked to CTE, what the hell is the game of football doing to others?

Virtually every play in football ends with a high-speed collision between at least two people…at least one of which is moving at full speed. From the first time a youngster puts on the pads and taps into that neanderthal gene that says “RRRAAAAAHHHHHRRRRRR!!!! HULK SMASH!!!!” they are subjecting themselves to the very real possibility of injuring their brain on a constant basis until the day they stop playing the game, be it one play later or when they retire from pro football. The damage done to a brain from a violent concussion can never be trusted to fully heal and the medical data supporting that conclusion gets bigger with every study done on the brain.

When do parents around the world finally say, “Not my child” and refuse to allow them to participate in sports where the risk for brain injury is so great? I’m not advocating one side over the other here, just asking that very important question….”When”? I’m certain that many parents out there won’t give a shit about anything that’s come to light and will keep enrolling their kids in these sports and will continue to scream encouragement from the stands when little Johnny plants a crushing hit on the son of another set of parents. They’ll yell “SHAKE IT OFF, RUB SOME DIRT ON IT AND GET BACK OUT THERE” even when it’s their kid on the sideline, woozy and nauseous from receiving a similar hit, even when their coaches insist they watch from the sideline until they’re cleared by a doctor to return to game action. I’m not sure where this is leading for the future of these sports, but I’m sure controversy will abound.

The Cubs and the Farm System

On a lighter note….Yeah, the Cubs suck hard this season and probably will in 2013 as well. While this is nothing new for us Cubs fans, what is new is there’s an actual plan to improve via the farm system. Let’s take a look at my top 5 prospects…

1. Anthony Rizzo, 1B The prize of the Adrian Gonzalez to Boston deal, the Cubs somehow heisted The Riz (That’s MINE and I expect royalties when he wins his first MVP and everyone calls him that) from the Padres for Andrew Cashner. Only 22 years old, he’s tearing it up at AAA to the tune of a .372/.422/.638 slash line and is only being held back by the issue of service time (free agency eligibility begins after 6 major league seasons and teams sometimes try to delay the eligibility clock by bringing young players up in June or July) and the fact that Bryan LaHair is playing well at the major league level. He’s a Hodgkin’s lymphoma survivor, so you know the kid is a fighter, too. I think he’s the most big league-ready of our youngsters and will give the Cubs a big run producer for a decade or so. ETA…June 2012

2. Brett Jackson, OF Jackson is a big, left-handed hitting OFer with superb defensive skills, is faster than rent in the ghetto and actually has the ability to draw a walk, something the Cubs haven’t stressed in the past. He’s prone to the strikeout, but so were plenty of other difference-makers with a similar tool set. I’m hoping he can be Jim Edmonds with more speed and less power. I don’t expect 40 homers from him, but 40 steals per season are in his sights. He’s excelled at every level he’s been at and at 23 is ready to hone his craft in Wrigley. There’s an available OF spot for him, but he’s in the same service time boat as The Riz. This kid is going to get every chance to be the dynamic leadoff hitter we have lusted after like we’ve lusted after a video of Kate Upton doing the Cat Daddy.

God help the rest of baseball if Jackson exceeds that level of awesomeness. ETA….June 2012

3. Javy Baez, 3B The last 1st round pick of the Jim Hendry reign of terror, he’s from the last MLB draft where overslotting and overpaying those players was possible. Drafted 9th overall in 2011, he’s 6′ 1″, 205ish, and still filling out since he’s only 19 years old. Scouts raved about how the ball jumps off his bat to all areas of the field. Defensively, he’s already a plus player and has the ability to play SS as well as 3B. Attitude may be an issue, though. He was recently scolded for admiring a home run and responded, “I can do whatever the fuck I want!” He’d better hit about 35 homers with a .300+ average in Wrigley if he’s going to be a cockbite. Hey, they can’t all be saints. ETA….2015

4. Matt Szczur, OF Pronounced “Caesar”, Szczur is a super athlete who played both baseball and football at Villanova before choosing baseball after being drafted in the 5th round of the 2010 draft. He probably would have chosen baseball anyway, but the Cubs gave him $100K to sign and another $500K to skip the NFL scouting combine. For $600K, I shudder to think what I’d do. He’s struggling a bit at High-A Daytona, but he was a project with a high ceiling when we drafted him and we can afford to let him learn his craft at his own pace. He’s athletic and was very durable in college while playing two sports. He’s gone from 5th round future to fast-track prospect making a name for himself in the organization. ETA….2014, maybe 2015

5. Trey McNutt, P The top pitching prospect in the system, McNutt, only 22, has two outstanding plus pitches…an overwhelming fastball and a big ol’ power curve that are almost major-league caliber as it is. Refining a 3rd pitch and sharpening his control a bit will be the keys for McNutt (yeah, you love that name) to make it as a starting pitcher in The Show. He is thought so highly of that the Cubs refused to include him in the Matt Garza trade and laughed in Boston’s collective faces when they wanted McNutt (don’t act like you’re not giggling) in compensation for Theo. Standing 6′ 4″, he’s an imposing figure on the mound and may even put a few more pounds on his 205 pound frame. We need more home-grown arms to compete, but McNutt is a good start. ETA…2013

Rocky Horror Live Cast Showing

Ok, off sports for a second. This past Friday night, I took my girls and two of their friends to the Arcada Theatre’s live cast showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show. If you’ve never seen this, it’s a Bucket List thing, especially if you like rude, vulgar, offensive and colorfully dressed people who worship a movie that bombed like it was dropped on Nagasaki in 1945. These goofs (said lovingly, of course) dress up in costume and act along with the movie in it’s entirety. But that’s not the fun part!! The fun part is the audience callbacks. During the whole movie, the dialogue in the movie is “answered” by the in-the-know members of the audience. Here’s a decent example of this. Gotta listen kind of close, but you can make out the callbacks.

The enjoyment level for virgins (Oh yeah, first-timers are called “virgins” and are marked with a lipsticked “V” on each cheek and some offensive words or artwork on foreheads or bald heads. Then, the cast tries to offend them pre-show. The guy who tried to offend me had the tables turned on him. Silly cross-dresser!!) depends on how good the audience is. It’s much more fun to hear everything crisp and in-time (My name is Janet. “SLUT!!”) rather than a bunch of people who aren’t into the flick. It’s very audience participatory-dependent for fun, because the movie itself pretty much sucks, which is why it bombed years ago. After the show, the cast is more than happy to pose for pics and shoot the proverbial shit with you. This is me and my boy, Frank. I think it’s a boy. I didn’t have the sack to look under it’s panties…

Bring your kids if you don’t mind taking a chance on scarring them for life. How can you, really, when it’s just a bunch of grown-ups prancing around in drag?

 

iPhone Sports Round Up (kind of…)

I’m going to be entirely honest here. I don’t think of the iAnything as a gaming device in any serious sense. Having games on your phone is neat, but I never really expect them to be of any real quality. Though, I’m generally more forgiving of them since they are usually free or 99 cents. That being said, there are some folks out there who’s only link to video games is their iWhatever and this article is really for them. Let’s face it, it’s hard work trying to decide what to spend our 99 cents (or nothing) on, and those of us who have the capacity challenged versions of our respective devices have even more to worry about in the realm of music, video, app, book, and photo priority. So here are the best and worst iThing sports games, in no order and written about totally at random!

Lies. Utter lies.

I wrote that paragraph before I actually looked into what was available in the realm of app store sports games. What has my research taught me?

Every sports game in the app store is garbage.

Seriously. There is so much trash in there you can almost iSmell it. And No, before you even say it, I haven’t played them all. I’m not going to pay 99 cents for every game and try them out. That’s crazy, and if I had a budget for these things I wouldn’t spend it on iOS games. I’d spend it on important things, or some grillz.

I’m not a very good journalist, so I actually just picked two games to write about out of all the crap I tried. I’m such a bad journalist that they were both baseball games. I’m such a terrible journalist that, in fact, they were both different versions of the same game. I could go on, but at some point your going to figure out I’m only going to write about one game. That one game is really great though. So good in fact, that I don’t think you need to play any other game on your iJiggamawhatzit.

 Just play Baseball Superstars II

Baseball Superstars II is pretty neat. It has everything you would expect a big name baseball game to have. It has the exhibition, home run derby, tournament, and season modes that all baseball games have. It also has “My League” modes, which allow you to manage a single team, single pitcher, or single position player through multiple seasons. In the My Pitcher and My Batter modes, you take control of a user made player and develop him into a star from the ground up, much like “Road to the Show” mode in MLB The Show. For a free iPhone app (the price has since gone up to not free) this mode is surprisingly robust and fun.

Overall, the actual gameplay in Baseball Superstars II is a fantastic mix of fast arcade style play and simulation. On the arcade side of things, it’s very easy to have a .400 or above batting average or an on base percentage of .600 or more. As a pitcher, look for 14 or 15 strikeout games all the time and wild curving fastballs that top 100 mph on a regular basis. The games are fast and it’s possible to play two or three games in ten minutes or less in some modes. You can fill out your batter or pitcher with super swings and super pitches, respectively, and choose two super players in the team mode. The super players are generally strange and entirely out of place, but they are still a fun addition to the game.

Some footage for all of you to see.

On the flip side, you have the different My League options that offer up a more realistic-in-quotes type of play. These modes are where the game both shines and shows it’s ugly side. The great gameplay is still very present, but there are nagging issues with how the My Pitcher and My Batter modes progress. While all three of the My League options are spectacularly engrossing and fun, they show the true nature of Gamevil’s business model in all its money grubbing glory. Sure building up your superstar pitcher is fun, but it happens so damn slowly and there are so many restrictions on you that some of that fun is ruined, all in an attempt to coerce you into spending real money on pretend shit. It’s an ingenious, although evil, tactic and I will never fully understand the hideous hate engine that is working behind the scenes.

At the heart of it, the My [Player] mode is a story based baseball RPG. After choosing whether you want to create a pitcher or position player, you alternate between training, resting, going on short dates with several virtual baseball girls (not kidding), and playing baseball. Overall, the story parts are overshadowed by the development of your player and actually playing baseball, but they are written well enough and are mostly humorous. At times they do feel out of place, but since they often give your player bonuses for watching them, they can be worthwhile.

Training your player is little more than deciding which stat you want to increase and watching a little animated exercise, but, as with the entire game, the presentation and style are great. Unfortunately though, this is where the game’s ugly side makes its appearance.

The training system is incredibly flawed and seems to be built entirely around funneling you into spending actual money in game. Since all of the actions you can take between games require “active” points, you are severely limited in how fast you can improve your player and experience the story. On top of that, you also have a moral rating that affects your ability to play at 100% and also if you get hurt or sick. Training reduces your moral far more than it increases your skills and winning games increases your morale far less that training reduces it. So you have to rest a lot to regain morale rather than train or hang with the ladies. You fall into a loop where if you don’t train, your player is slapped with skill debuffs. If you don’t rest, you get hurt or sick from low morale. If you’re always training and resting, you never see any of the story segments. It really is a vicious trap where the only solution is spending real money for boosts to in game cash so you can buy items that heal your player or give him more active points, or paying to turn off sickness and injuries.

The micro transaction business model has the ability to work and be profitable without sticking it to the player, but it’s a flaming pickled pitch-fucking-fork in the ass in this case. I find that sad because the game is so good, Gamevil could easily have priced it higher, made it a little less of a jerk, and kept those micro transactions out entirely. Why they chose to be assholes I will never know. It not only decreases their relevance and credibility as game developers, but also tarnishes iOS devices as gaming platforms in general. This is an argument for a dedicated video game site however. Cad T. Wasp is too good for that kind of talk.

 /soapbox

My ranting aside, this game is absolutely great. The pitching mechanics are intuitive and easy. There’s a good selection of pitch types to choose from and they generally function realistically. Batting requires skill and timing, but isn’t so difficult to be a detriment, though the “swing” button could be a bit larger. Other than that the touch controls work flawlessly. Creating your pitcher’s Super Pitch is one of the more fun and well thought out parts of the game, and making your own Bugs Bunny pitch is well worth the trouble. If you have the patience to stick with the game, eventually all the stuff in the last two paragraphs won’t matter since you will accumulate enough money and G-points (the game’s currency) to never have to worry about your morale or limits on the actions you can take between games. It’s all fun from there on out.

If I was a reviewer, instead of just some guy, I’d grade it or give it some arbitrary number. But I am just some guy so I’ll just tell you Baseball Superstars II is the best sports game in the app store. There are actually several games in the series, many of them free and all of them great, but I find the visual style of this version to sync the best with the mechanics and overall feel of the game. Though some people may be put off by the anime style, the art is charming and the overall presentation is top notch.

So get it. Get it now and reduce the game speed in the options menu to give it a real leisurely baseball pace. Otherwise it plays way too fast.

If you want to know just how Asian this game is, check out the trailer.

Oh yeah, it’s also on Android stuff now. YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE!

HOMELUN!

Episode 002

To download, right click and save as this link.

In this week’s episode, Andy and Moe can’t figure out who should take the lead, we talk some Penn State Football issues, Andy makes a Blackhawks prediction, Moe’s boxing heart is broken by Andy’s favorite Joe Frazier memory, we have our very first contest, and Moe is sad about the NBA.